Feminine vs Feminist
I consider myself feminine, not a feminist. I think there is a distinct difference. To start with, I don’t believe men and women are equal. (Bare with me, I will explain what I mean by that.)
Being feminine to me, is to embrace my intellectual and sexual powers as a woman, without holding them as bait or superiority above anyone, male or female. It is about being comfortable about where I am in life. Being “at the right place, at the right time, doing the right thing”, so to say.
I feel, once upon a time, being a feminist was about this. It was about achieving equality in certain things; pay in the workplace; voting rights; protection from domestic violence and harassment; a right to purchase birth control; etc, but still recognizing the distinct differences between man and woman. Now feminism seems more about putting men “in their place” and asserting dominance over them. For example:
Awhile ago I was talking to a woman who asked me if I intended to be at a stay-at-home mother. I do, as I feel it will be more beneficial to them then being place into a nanny’s arms or daycare at three months old, besides I also have a home business. The woman then proceeded to unleash a tirade about how I was a disgrace to the “feminist movement” for only aspiring to be a lowly housewife rather then asserting myself into the workplace being “The Dominant Sex”.
I might have dismissed her argument as a fluke in the feminist community but I have found such statements to be so reoccurring as to completely turn me off to the concept of modern feminism.
But I said I don’t think men and women are equal, didn’t I? Isn’t that imply one is “The Dominant Sex” and “The Submissive Sex”? Not quite.
Starting from a purely physical standpoint, women bear children, men do not. However the children would not be possible without the man’s seed. Neither can be superior as the process is mutually symbiotic.
Psychologically, women, in general, tend to be nurturers and men, in general, tend to be protectors. Some seem to feel this turns women into victims, but I don’t feel they realize the power of a nurturer. Protectors need love and care, they need nurturers. In turn nurturers need the feelings of stability and safety that a protector can provide. Now I am not saying that every relationship has to have a man and woman to be functional, I am a supporter of gay rights, and believe those relationships can be just as functional. However many of the gay relationships I have seen have someone in the role of nurturer and someone as protector as well.
So in conclusion, I think I am more of an advocate of balance, instead of the constant power struggle between the sexes. In my opinion relationships, including platonic ones, need a yin and yang balance to promote healing and growth.