Michael and Jaspenelle

Rosemary Plant and Tracy Holeton

The maintenance people for our townhouse complex killed my rosemary. They were out spraying the other day and apparently the don’t know the difference between weeds in ground and a potted plant on my steps. Two days later the weeds and my rosemary are completely dead.

Arg! I’m pissed! That was my most used herb.

Anyhow, Tracy Holeton… I received a package from her with an adorable baby outfit in it but there was no note with it. The return address baby outfit from her, no note or anything. The return address is to a Tracy Holeton of Unico Inc. in Franksville, WI? I don’t know any Tracys.

Anyone know who my mystery woman is?

Maybe a bit ranty

For those people who read my blog and take issue with me talking about my life with Damian or attached parenting get over it, you choose to read it after all. I won’t be offended if you stop reading, I probably won’t even notice!

I have gotten several comments about commenting on my blog lately. Above the comment box on each post it has always said:

Comments are moderated and may not show up immediately. Please be patient, do not post twice, we will get your comment.

I pinkie swear that I do not purposely moderate anyones comments. Some comments go into the moderation queue for a variety of reasons but mainly because you probably clear your cookies often (I think it also happens when you or change the email address you use when you comment or post lots of links…) If your comment doesn’t show up after you post it, you can be 99.9% sure I got it and just need to approve it, which Michael or I will do when we have a moment to spare (I do delete duplicates though.)

I know I have been talking about breastfeeding a lot lately but it takes up a huge portion of my day. In fact I only have time to blog while I breastfeed. My brother had a good point though that there are other aspects to parenting I could discuss. None of them are as much of a challenge to me (or take as much time) as breastfeeding though. Still I am going to try to take hsi advice, the other stuff might be pretty interesting to some as well. Michael and I practice natural and attached parenting, so I am going to try to start talking about co-sleeping, babywearing, bathing together, cloth diapering, not letting Damian cry it out, natural childbirth and delayed vaccination.

Oh and another thing I do not intend for any of my posts to be an attack on anyone else who has an alternate parenting style to ours. Attached parenting is simply what works best for our situation. Please don’t take my posts as a personal attack on you, I don’t have time to waste attacking individuals. Believe it or not a baby is very time consuming! Hehe.

Anyhow, I will talk about all these things but Damian just dozed off so we are going to nap now… and then continue the search for the missing camera upload cable. I have some cloth diapering photos to post.

Breasts are for Babies

I’ve only been breastfeeding for a month and I am already outraged at people who sexualize the act of feeding your child. Don’t they realize breasts are for breastfeeding? Why else would women have them?

Damian and I took a walk over to Rite Aid today and then to the park, where he decided it was lunch time, so I picked a discreet bench under some trees and away from the road and basketball court and fed him. A lady came by a couple minutes later with her toddler and we talked for a few minutes. She said I was very brave to feed him in public.

I know her statement was not far off the mark (though I feel more stubborn type-A then brave.) I shouldn’t have to be brave to breastfeed in public though, no woman should. I am protected by Washington law after all (unlike Idaho law, so I guess I am out of luck when I go to Coeur d’Alene.) I have more coverage when Damian is at the breast (because of his handsome big baby head) then what I see some teenage girls in the street showing (heck, more then some of my party dresses.) I personally don’t feel that breastfeeding needs to be hidden away as if it were dirty. Breastmilk as well as nursing at the breast (rather then a bottle) is best for babies, there are more then enough studies to support that statement and I want to give my baby the very best since I can.

I was starting to feel like the only one who thought this way (maybe this is what growing up overseas does to you?) but I recently found a group of women who agree, which was nice. Now if only they were local instead of online… Though I think I am going to try to go to a Mindful Mamas meeting this Thursday, I feel I might find some kindred spirits there.

Pregnancy Pet Peeves

I am pregnant and I realize this makes me moody, but that does not discount my emotions. The moodiness makes all my pet peeves glaringly obvious, which in turn makes me notice how ridiculous I can be. Which cam be depressing or funny at times.

One of my friends offered me a rather amusing solution for the annoying people who come up and invade my personal space try to rub my baby belly. Usually this action is met by a rather explosive variety anger on my part (haven’t been arrested yet though.) She sugguested I should just rub their bellies back, with a statement asking about what trimester they are in. It seems to get the point across quite well while keeping me in decently good humor.

Oddly enough, no one ever tries to touch my belly when I am out with Michael, maybe he looks intimidating… I don’t know if he is more protecting me or protecting everyone else from me.

Moving on in the land of pregnancy pet peeves, people who try to guess how I am feeling: you look ready to pop!/getting anxious yet?/feeling uncomfortable? Which feels the same to me as when someone says “Are you sick? Cuz you look like shit!”

I am pregnant, this is natural, yes it has its uncomfortable moments since it feels like I have a beachball full of kittens strapped to my abdomen. If I start feeling not fine, I will say so. I do understand that people worry but the only thing that is really stressing me about pregnancy lately is being assumed to not be anything but okay. Is this unfair of me to not want to answer the questions? Maybe, but I think everyone wants to be treated like their usual self most of the time, not as a curiosity. (This whole paragraph is mostly directed at people who are not family or close friends. Both family and close friends are allowed to touch my tummy as much as they want too.)

Oh and I can’t forget the flood of parenting advice from everyone, particularly those who seem hell bent on it only being their way or the highway. Do they really think I am going to retain anything they are telling me when I can’t even remember what I ate for breakfast? Sometimes they seem to think mocking me is a prefect way of getting their point across. Do they really think saying things like

• “Oh, a natural birth? Haha! You will be screaming for an epidural hun.”
• or “Cloth diapers, you won’t last a day!”

help me in any way shape or form? Mocking is not an effective tactic and I do not have the type of personality that cowers in the face of opposition. Just a warning, eventually Michael will not be around to protect you from me!

So that is pretty much it as far as the pet peeves go. On a whole, there is actually way more positives flying around then this post suggests. The good far far far outweigh the bad, which is a huge blessing, if it wasn’t for those kind words and actions I don’t I could keep the couple scraps of rational thought around when people annoy me.

So huge thank yous should go out to all those people, Michael, Dad, Aunt Vickie, Shannon, Eve, that lady at the garden center, both Aunt Ruths, Aunt Lois, Nana (yes I do get your comments!), AZ, Alex, Kim, Ginanne and a ton of people I am forgetting.

You are all keeping me from being arrested for assault!

Baby Movements

The baby is sooo active, it is so cool! He is getting big enough that my whole stomach moves when he kicks or repositions. It kind of reminds me of Alien! (I realize that is not the most attractive definition but it is pretty true…) He is developing some rather defined awake/sleep cycles, I could set a timer by a lot of them. The most notable of them happens to be around 21:00, when I am trying to go to sleep. If I rub my tummy or hum sometimes he calms, sometimes he gets more active though, but he responds to where I touch in those cases.

Otherwise all is well except for a pet peeve I have developed (I think it is a pet peeve.) I have noticed that when I tell people that it is a boy people say, “I’m sure Michael is pleased!” What? He wouldn’t be pleased or as happy if it were a girl? I know Michael is not a typical “guy” but really are general male expectations that strongly bias as to create that stereotype? I wish people would quit saying that. We are happy it is a healthy baby, period. But like I said this is just a pregnancy pet peeve. (Also, no, Michael and I will not be decorating our little boy’s room with a sports theme, we are doing a neutral celestial one.)

Oh! And the baby really likes when I stand with direct sunlight on my belly, I wonder if he is aware of the light in a visual way or if it is more about the warmth?

Litter Bugs

I have found one predominate thing since working part time in parking lots; that my previously conceived notions that it is a social requirement to not littler is a completely falsehood. Every morning there are dozens of beer bottles, fast food containers and other miscellaneous objects (diapers, clothing, cigarette cartons etc) laying around the lot. Especially when there is a city trash can on every curb around the lot.

Today really took the cake though, I found a urine catheter bag totally full of pee in the lot today. Totally totally totally gross! I don’t care if it was frozen solid and in a sealed bag, I consider it completely unacceptable. People, please take your own hazardous, potentially disease ridden bodily fluids home with you!

Needless to say, I had someone else come and dispose of it.

So how was your day?

Eager to Complain

(A local electronics store just before opening today, the line went all the way down the block!)

People seem so eager to complain this time of year. Too much rampant consumerism, too much stress, too much Christmas music, too much cold, too much food… We have the personal choice to not indulge in these things you know? Why does it matter to you if other people if people like standing in line in the wee hours of the morning the day after Thanksgiving to shop? Let them have their fun. People seem so keen to dwell on the negative traits in others rather then encouraging the positive ones.

I admit I fall into this trend too, it is hard to stay optimistic. It is so easy to criticize. Have you ever tried to go just an hour without using the words “no” “can’t” “never” and other negatives? It is really tiring. I’ve been trying it out today, I’m trying to avoid using negatives in this post even.

I adore the Holiday season. I love the food, I love the carols, I love the decorations and getting creative with them, I love gifting, I love the gatherings, I love the cold and the snow. I am not too keen on the crazy shopping conditions but I can avoid them and shop online if I must. Besides when you hit the store at 10pm, as Michael and I seem to frequently do, chances are you are going to find short lines.

Yes, maybe we should all try to remember the charitable spirit of Christmas, but if you really want that giant inflatable snow globe for your lawn, go for it, especially if it makes you or those you love smile. I really do hope you all enjoy this time of year and all the years holidays. Happiness feels infinitely better then bitter sadness.