Michael and Jaspenelle

Dream: Alien Invasion

Last night I dreamed:

Aliens were invading the Earth.

One of our friends, who turned out to be a FBI agent, came to our home and told us that they were allergic to urinal tablets and had an aversion to hearing humans read outloud. Several of our friends were over and we all started making wreaths out of urinal tablets, which were then featured on the six-clock news.

The aliens then started going house to house, taking people to a camp. When they came to our townhouse, we all started reading from various books (I actually remember what book I was reading, “The Pagan Book of Living and Dying”.) I had Damian in my lap, hidden under a blanket. The alien left quickly. After he was gone we all went outside and got a car from one of our neighbors. It was more of a cage with wheels actually, he gave it to us.

We drove out to Elk to a friends house with a bomb shelter and hide there for awhile. Eventually the aliens found us and beamed in, taking us to a camp. There we found out that our organic matter was going to be harvested so that the aliens could make new ships. One of the aliens tried to inject one of our friends who turned out to be Cyborg (superhero… ya, no more Smallville for me.) I started reciting from “The End of America: Letter of Warning to a Young Patriot” (a book I actually ordered the other say) since all books were band.

We people in the camp rose up against the aliens and all started reciting passages from books them new from 1984 through the Lord’s Prayer. The aliens started screaming and killing people but we kept speaking.

Then I woke up. Weird dream huh? I woke up thinking there were aliens in the bedroom and about to grab a book and start reading, reality set in pretty fast though and I had to laugh. Urinal tablet allergy?

No more B-movies or politics for me! (Except I am watching a documentary on The Weather Underground at the moment, so that declaration is a little empty.) Alien invasions never go well.

I HAZ A SPUN

My Auntie Andrea made this for me. I love it!

Dream: The Draft

I had a dream last night that a couple military men came to the door wanting Damian to answer his draft notice. I tried to tell them he was too young (he was only three years old in the dream) but they wanted him anyways. They were holding a gun for him. They had a draft notice for Michael too. I was so angry at the government from taking away the people I love.

I told the soldiers to wait in the kitchen while I got a couple things for Damian. I told them Michael would be home in a few minutes. I took Damian, went upstairs and I called Michael when I was upstairs and told him what was going on. He said “you know what to do.”

I did. I dug a shotgun out of the closet and went downstairs and shot the military men. I dragged their bodies into the garden and put a tarp over them. I went and got Damian from upstairs and we started packing. Michael got home a few minutes later and we loaded the car and started driving to Canada. All the billboards on the way had patriotic and religious slogans and Palin on them. I was so disgusted.

We picked up Michael’s family, who also had to flee since they were the “wrong” kind of Christian (they are LDS) as well as Michelle, Mikcos and Nathan because Nathan had gotten his notice. I woke up when we were getting on the road again.

Very freaky.

Food Meme

Got this from my Dad, added a few at the end from my brother. This was a bit tricky for me because I am one of those people who will try just about anything even if I am not sure what it is.

Bold what you have eaten and strikethrough what you would never eat.

1. Venison
2. Nettle tea - pregnant women drink it
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare - best way to have steak
5. Crocodile (or Alligator)
6. Black pudding - or was it blood sausage?
7. Cheese fondue - YUMMY!
8. Carp
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush - I get it on my pita at Pita Pit
11. Calamari
12. Pho
13. PB&J sandwich - with bananas and honey
14. Aloo gobi - I love exotic vegetarian foods
15. Hot dog from a street cart - Does the sausage I got on a baguette in Porte de Clignancourt count? Granted I have had some form of sausage from street vendors everywhere I’ve been.
16. Epoisses - and I wouldn’t eat it again.
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes - peach, blackberry, dandelion, and probably some others…
19. Steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream - gross!
21. Heirloom tomatoes - I just finished dehydrating some the other day.
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn (head cheese) — maybe?
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper - unless there is lots of money involved and milk
27. Dulce de leche - soooo good!
28. Oysters - I’ve even had live ones that move when you squeeze lemon juice on them. Had nightmares about them crawling back out my throat.
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl - one of my favorite warming foods
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar - cigars are NASTY! Cognac should be aged +10 years please.
37. Clotted cream tea - I’ll pass.
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O - I prefer the rum watermelon.
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects - I’m taking it a worm as a kid doesn’t count? How about chocolate covered ants?
43. Phaal - I like spicy but I would rather not practice scorched earth on my taste buds
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whiskey
46. Fugu - my son needs a mother
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut - GROSS, gave me hives too.
50. Sea urchin – would love to try
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi - way too salty
53. Abalone
54. Paneer - I think I’ve had this at an Indian restaurant in Barcelona.
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini - not a fan
58. Beer above 8% ABV - not sure
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips - Nasty. Just give me chocolate chips please.
61. S’mores - campers stable
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin - the clay? Sure, it is used in some herbal remedies.
64. Currywurst - now that just sounds unappealing, and German. Not a big fan of German food.
65. Durian - I would try it but it is not like they import something that reeks that much…
66. Frogs’ legs - I like them, but so small that they are barely worth the effort.
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake - all of the above
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette – I AM NEVER EATING SOUTHERN FOOD AGAIN. UG!
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe - with sugar cube right?
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill – our neighbors son hit a Bambi
76. Baijiu - is this like Everclear?
77. Hostess Fruit Pie - also gave me hives. Kind of like that deep-fried Twinkly. America is weird.
78. Snail – smothered in garlic butter, also yummy
79. Lapsang souchong - this sounds good, I love tea.
80. Bellini, Mimosa, Kir Royale - while camping last week!
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky - craved this when I was pregnant
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant
85. Kobe beef – too expensive
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers - I drink and make herbal remedies, what do you think? Rose, violet, chamomile, echinacea, chive, clover…
89. Horse – possibly?
90. Criollo chocolate - maybe?
91. Spam - I draw the line somewhere
92. Soft shell crab – caught on the North Carolina beach, an exception to the Southern food thing.
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish - another southern exception, whoops!
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor – this sounds good
98. Polenta - I make this!
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee - is this the one I accidentally used once that dad had a fit about?
100. Snake - would love to try

Ones my brother siggusted for the list:

101. Kopi Luwak - little weird but I would try it
102. Casu Marzu - adventuresome eater doesn’t mean insane.
103. Balut - no different then any other meat, I would be a hypocrite if I said no. I think there is an Indian dish made with goat fetus too…
104. Escamoles - cottage cheese ants… no.
105. Lutefisk - sure, probably wouldn’t like it though
106. Dog - why not?
107. Ortolan - it’s illegal anyhow.

My addition/question:

108. Jolt and a Moon Pie: My friend Rodney told me about this when I was a child, it was one of the first things I tried after I moved to the USA. I think the combination should be on some illegal drug list…
109. Corn Drink from Mexican street vendor: It had whole corn in some kind of liquid that I got when I wandered out of church. It was awesome.

Large Hadron Collider

Has the LHC destroyed the world yet?

If you follow me on twitter then you know about the imminent destruction of the Earth, due to today’s testing of the Large Hadron Collider. So I want to suggest that everyone take these last hours to appreciate our world that is about to be replaced by a black hole. Perhaps indulge in a geeky drinking game with End of the World Chocolate Cakes^[1]

If our planet doesn’t become to the newest celestial address for a black hole and aliens don’t destroy us for threatening the balance in the universe, I can only hope that we open a dimension to where everything is made of chocolate (rather then something only Bruce Campbell can save us from.)

Oh ya, and don’t forget the music!

Update: The Earth has been destroyed.

Dream: Jesus’ Crucification

One of last night’s dreams:

I was walking over a hill and came upon a medium sized crowd of people. I wandered over to see what was going on and saw a man being crucified, well, kind of. He was tied and nailed to a wooden stake (no crossbeam.) There was the “This is Jesus the King of the Jews” sign over his head in three languages.

I felt horrified watching this happen and felt it was a really cruel practice. I also remember feeling pity for Jesus and the heartless people doing the deed. I saw him as another victim of another church gone wrong.

(At this point I transitioned into a completely seperate dream about sailing and pouring white flowers into the sea, except the sea was a face smiling at me, or something like that.)

I came across a video the other day of modern day people who crucify themselves in the Philippines, so I am thinking that is where this dream’s seed was planted. A wooden stake instead of a cross though? That was a little strange. Jesus meets burning on the stake?

This wouldn’t be my first dream with Jesus but last time he was driving a mustang convertible (my favorite car) with three wingless angels, and that was a few years ago. So, slightly different from this one…

Kubla Khan

Is it weird that one of my favorite poems was written by someone in the throws of an opium experience? Maybe I am just a fan of very bizarre imagery…

Kubla Khan
Vision in a Dream. A Fragment
(by Samuel Taylor Coleridge)

In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
A stately pleasure-dome decree:
Where Alph, the sacred river, ran
Through caverns measureless to man
Down to a sunless sea.

So twice five miles of fertile ground
With walls and towers were girdled round:
And there were gardens bright with sinuous rills,
Where blossomed many an incense-bearing tree;
And here were forests ancient as the hills,
Enfolding sunny spots of greenery.

But oh! that deep romantic chasm which slanted
Down the green hill athwart a cedarn cover!
A savage place! as holy and enchanted
As e’er beneath a waning moon was haunted
By woman wailing for her demon-lover!
And from this chasm, with ceaseless turmoil seething,
As if this earth in fast thick pants were breathing,
A mighty fountain momently was forced:
Amid whose swift half-intermitted burst
Huge fragments vaulted like rebounding hail,
Or chaffy grain beneath the thresher’s flail:
And ‘mid these dancing rocks at once and ever
It flung up momently the sacred river.
Five miles meandering with a mazy motion
Through wood and dale the sacred river ran,
Then reached the caverns measureless to man,
And sank in tumult to a lifeless ocean:
And ‘mid this tumult Kubla heard from far
Ancestral voices prophesying war!

The shadow of the dome of pleasure
Floated midway on the waves;
Where was heard the mingled measure
From the fountain and the caves.
It was a miracle of rare device,
A sunny pleasure-dome with caves of ice!

A damsel with a dulcimer
In a vision once I saw:
It was an Abyssinian maid,
And on her dulcimer she played,
Singing of Mount Abora.
Could I revive within me
Her symphony and song,
To such a deep delight ‘twould win me
That with music loud and long
I would build that dome in air,
That sunny dome! those caves of ice!
And all who heard should see them there,
And all should cry, Beware! Beware!
His flashing eyes, his floating hair!
Weave a circle round him thrice,
And close your eyes with holy dread,
For he on honey-dew hath fed
And drunk the milk of Paradise.

I looked up several of my favorite stories and poems this evening and was somewhat amused to find that many of them were written by opium addicts. I am not sure what that says about my subconscious, but I am sure Mr Lacy, my English teacher from high school, would be pleased that I find enjoyment in some of the classics.

Do you have any favorite poems?

Sharing my Weekend

Two Phrases That Destroyed American Culture - I ran across this article yesterday and loved it, so I thought I would share.

I also thought I would share some stuff from my weekend::

I made cinnamon rolls from scratch:

They were yummy! Next time I am going to use different icing though, maybe just a milk/sugar glaze.

Michael had to be at work from 4am to 8am on Saturday, so he napped with Damian while I made them:

I made labels for some things in the kitchen:

The olive oil bottle says “Olive Oil (now with extra virgins)” because… well, it just amused me.

I got some new shoes at ShopKo (on clearance and 50% off, so $30 shoes for $3!)

We also picked up my diaphragm from the midwives and bought storage bins for my 25lbs of bread flour and sugar. But you don’t need pictures of those.

I got some reading in.

If you are into herbalism I strongly recommend Family Herbal by Rosemary Gladstar.

Last night be went over to Shannon’s and she gave us some organic produce from her garden, yum! Five cobs of corn, lots of green beans, a couple Anaheim peppers, a cucumber and a few more zucchini! I think I am going to be making zucchini relish with them this time.

I’ll probably be dehydrating some zucchini as well, for future use in pasta sauce and maybe to take camping in a vegetable soup mix.

And to end my sharing post, I wanted to share an amazing speech by Archbishop Tutu! What will happen when the last of our great leaders die? Do we have new ones within our generation? I hope so. (On a slightly amusing note, Archbishop Tutu refers to “ubunto” in his speech, defining it is “the essence of being human.” The Linux distro that I use is also called Ubunto!)

NFDS - The Guide

Your result for The Perception Personality Image Test…

NFDS - The Guide

Nature, Foreground, Detail, and Shape

Take The Perception Personality Image Test at HelloQuizzy

Real News: Bigfoot

While some of my fellow bloggers discuss the controversy surrounding the Beijing Olympics, dams bursting in the Grand Canyon and unrest in the Middle East; I, Jaspenelle Stewart, bring you the real news. One that is near and dear to those of us in the Pacific Northwest.

(Can I get a drum roll?)

Georgia men defend Bigfoot body claims

A pair of Georgia men faced more than a half-hour of skeptical questions from reporters Friday as they defended their claim that they stumbled upon the body of Bigfoot while hiking in a remote North Georgia forest. [Read more...]

So many questions arise that the reporters forgot to ask!

What was one of our bigfoot families doing in Georgia? Did aliens help them move? Damn paparazzi, so hard to get away from. Perhaps the Booteans helped them move. Knowing our bighearted bigfoot, he invited Mothman and the Jersey Devil the housewarming party too. I bet they sat around the campfire smoking bud and drinking Molson and singing Kumbaya.

The biggest question though, how did one of the sasquatch die? So help me if it was one of those trigger happy rednecks shot him! Donchaknow they are endangered?! Send the WWF after them! (…or the WWE for that matter… rednecks might understand that better.)

The truth is out there.