Michael and Jaspenelle

Life and such

Ok, so it’s been a long time since I blogged about anything, and Jaspenelle said she won’t start blogging again until I do, so I’m stuck.

So here’s a rundown of interesting (or not) things that have been happening in my life lately.

The biggest change is moving to a new house. We are pretty much completely moved. There are a few things still left in the other place, but we rarely use them and they will just be going into storage in the basement. It’s still there because we need to go through and purge a lot of it. We want to avoid moving as much trash as possible - mostly because we have to pay for trash at our new place and don’t at our old place.

I’m sure Jaspenelle will post with more pictures and such. Oh yea, we are going to have a combined birthday/housewarming party on Saturday April 18th. If you are interested in coming, let us know. It will probably be a potluck and BYOB.

Our phone number, e-mail address, and such haven’t changed. The only thing that changed is our address. Our new address is:

1520 E Bridgeport Ave
Spokane, WA 99207

So please update your address books (hint hint Jaspy’s dad - please don’t send any packages to our old address - did you ever update your address book from our last move?)

Another recent change is a promotion I got at work. I have been made a buyer. I am now in charge of purchasing all organic produce and our complete grocery line. I actually started purchasing the grocery line back in October, but it was only in February when they officially made me a buyer and gave me the raise that comes with that. So far, grocery items have been simple. Organics are quite difficult - demand isn’t consistent, and with it being produce, the shelf life is quite short. But I am handling it quite well so far. We just gained a large retail account in this area, and they have showed interest in purchasing a large portion of their organics through us, so that is a good thing. More demand and volume makes purchasing much easier. We’ll see how that goes.

As far as hobbies and such go, I haven’t really had time for them. Between working more hours doing purchasing, and being a new father, time is tight. Occasionally I’ll design a new website for Jaspy, but most of my down time (what little of it there is) is just spent surfing the Internet - mostly the local newspaper, slashdot, and digg. I’m finding that I don’t really miss doing many of the things I used to when I was single - they just aren’t as fulfilling as raising a family. I do however have a large honey-do list of website improvements and software that Jaspy would like me to get done. I need to make it easier for her to upload videos, for one - we have lots of videos, just none of them are online. So maybe after things settle down from the move I’ll work on that. I’d also like to get the webcams running again so you can tune in and see what Damian is doing. And then there’s the podcasts that Jaspy was trying to do, but couldn’t because I didn’t have the time or energy to edit, mix and publish them for her - I need to teach her how to do that so that she can make her self-imposed deadlines.

Well, dinner is almost done, so I’ll wrap this up for now. Laters.

Propostion 8 and Hate

If you’ve followed the news lately, you know that California’s Proposition 8, which modifies the state constitution to restrict the definition of marriage to be between a man and a woman, essentially denying the rights of any gay couple to enjoy the benefits of marriage.

What exactly does this mean - here is an exhaustive list of the rights and responsibilities of marriage:

Rights when your spouse passes

• Pensions
• Survivor benefits & payouts
• Continuation of health insurance
• Copyrights
• Water rights
• Wages & workers compensation
• Consent/objection for body donation
• Notice of probate hearings
• Permission to make funeral arrangements
• Funeral & bereavement leave
• Inheritance of property

Rights while married

• Assistance for spouses separated due to military service
• Per diem payments
• Immigration sponsor
• Disability payments and benefits
• Social Security
• Medicaid
• Income Tax deductions, credits, etc
• Preferential hiring for spouses of veterans in government jobs
• Tax-free transfer of property between spouses
• Change of surname when married
• Right to enter into a prenuptial agreement
• Spousal privilege in court proceedings (same concept as doctor-client privilege and attorney-client privilege)

Shared rights of both partners

• Bankruptcy
• Parenting rights
• Visitation rights (hospital, prison)
• Next-of-kin status (emergency medical decisions, wrongful death filings)
• Custody of children, shared property, child support, and alimony after divorce
• Domestic violence intervention
• Access to “family only” services such as reduced rates to certain clubs and organizations
• Adoption and foster care
• Joint tax filing
• Insurance coverage
• Legal status with step-children

Responsibilities

• Spouse income and assets counts when applying for assistance
• Subject to conflict-of-interest rules
• Ineligible to receive survivor benefits upon remarriage

Many of these rights can be given by entering into legal contracts between two people, but many of them can only be given via marriage. Why does marriage have to be limited to between only a man and a woman? There is nothing in this list that would apply differently if the relationship is between a woman and a woman or between a man and a man versus being between a man and a woman.

Why is it that so many people are against denying these rights and responsibilities to two people that love each other?

Are they scared their own marriage won’t mean as much because suddenly gays are allowed to marry? Marriage doesn’t mean much already - just look at the divorce rate in this country. Just because Jane and Joe down the street have a terrible relationship doesn’t mean that your relationship is going to be terrible.

People that are against gay marriage say that it will destroy our society because the children raised by gays are growing up in an unhealthy environment. There are plenty of cases where heterosexual couples don’t love each other. Which is the better environment for the child? With parents that love you and each other, or with parents that don’t love each other? Or even worse, being a single parent.

I have a good friend that is a single parent, she has done an excellent job of raising her daughter. If a single person can do a good job of raising a child, then two people working together can raise an even better child. And I argue that a single parent can do a better job then two people who don’t love each other - as there will always be fighting between the parents, which is not a good environment for a child.

There are many gay couples that want to have children. There are many many many children in this country that need loving parents. Why are we denying the gays the right to adopt and raise these children? The heterosexuals aren’t doing it, why not let the gays? How many of these children raised by “the system” are actually healthy contributing members of society? Most of them are really screwed up. If a gay couple can raise a child in a healthy environment, and it keeps one kid from being really screwed up, then let them!

I plan to raise my children in a way to teach them tolerance. If someone loves another person, they should be able to marry - it doesn’t hurt me or my family in any way, and doesn’t prevent me from raising my family how I want. So I will tolerate them doing what they want with their lives. Live and let live..

All people are equal, whether black, white, man, woman, gay, or straight. Anytime you try to restrict the rights of others, you are preaching hate. I will not tolerate hate around my child.

My parents are LDS, and are very strongly against gay rights. But, they never acted before to inhibit the rights of gays to marry. But that has changed. The LDS church was the source of most of the funding for the proposition 8 campaign. My parents give 10% of their income to the LDS church. So they have indirectly supported the proposition 8 campaign, and so have acted to inhibit the rights of gays to marry. This makes them preachers of hate (as well as any other person who tithes to the LDS church).

So, until my parents recognize the rights of gays to marry, and quit supporting hateful organizations, they will not see my son, and in turn, my wife or myself. I will not tolerate teachings of hate in my home, and will not expose my family to hate.

For my parents to see my son, myself, and my wife again, the following must happen:

• They must write a letter recognizing that they have been hateful, express regret for being hateful, and stating that they have changed their opinion on gay marriage
• They must either quit giving money to the LDS church or the LDS church must stop acting in a hateful way, and recognize the right of gays to marry

Jaspenelle and I have discussed this. She believes it is a very strong stance, but has agreed to go along with it - she very much believes in the rights of people who love each other to marry.

Because Jaspenelle Asked: The Year… 2001

I usually avoid these types of entries, but Jaspy asked nicely, it’s 6am, and I have nothing better to do… sooooo….

The Rules:

• Go to Music Outfitters.
• Enter the year you were done with high school in the search function and get the list of 100 most popular songs of that year.
• Bold the songs you like, strike through the ones you REALLY dislike.
• I’m adding color to the ones I absolutely adored.
• Tag some people. Not going to happen

1. Lady Marmalade Christina Aguilera, Lil’ Kim, Mya & Pink
2. Fallin’, Alicia Keys
3. I’m Real, Jennifer Lopez
4. Family Affair, Mary J. Blige
5. Butterfly, Crazy Town
6. Thank You, Dido
7. Don’t Tell Me, Madonna
8. He Loves U Not, Dream
9. Gone, ‘N Sync
10. Love Don’t Cost A Thing, Jennifer Lopez
11. Hero, Enrique Iglesias
12. Hanging By A Moment, Lifehouse
13. Drops Of Jupiter, Train
14. Jaded, Aerosmith
15. U Remind Me, Usher
16. Hit ‘Em Up Style, Blu Cantrell
17. Survivor, Destiny’s Child
18. It Wasn’t Me, Shaggy featuring Ricardo “Rikrok” Ducent
19. All For You, Janet Jackson
20. Angel, Shaggy featuring Rayvon
21. Turn Off The Light, Nelly Furtado
22. All Or Nothing, O-Town
23. How You Remind Me, Nickelback
24. Someone To Call My Lover, Janet Jackson
25. Fill Me In, Craig David
26. It’s Been Awhile, Staind
27. I’m Like A Bird, Nelly Furtado
28. Bootylicious, Destiny’s Child
29. Again, Lenny Kravitz
30. Let Me Blow Ya Mind, Eve featuring Gwen Stefani
31. Everywhere, Michelle Branch
32. Stutter, Joe featuring Mystikal
33. Irresistable , Jessica Simpson
34. I Hope You Dance, Lee Ann Womack
35. Nobody Wants To Be Lonely, Ricky Martin & Christina Aguilera
36. Here’s To The Night, Eve 6
37. Beautiful Day, U2
38. Emotion, Destiny’s Child
39. Superman (It’s Not Easy), Five For Fighting
40. Southside, Moby with Gwen Stefani
41. The Space Between, Dave Matthews Band
42. Play, Jennifer Lopez
43. When It’s Over, Sugar Ray
44. Drive, Incubus
45. More Than That, Backstreet Boys
46. What Would You, Do City High
47. Be Like That, 3 Doors Down
48. I Wanna Be Bad, Willa Ford
49. Peaches & Cream , 112
50. Ride Wit Me, Nelly
51. Only Time, Enya
52. Where The Party At, Jagged Edge with Nelly
53. Standing Still, Jewel
54. Pop, ‘N Sync
55. This Is Me, Dream
56. Never Had A Dream Come True, S Club 7
57. Crazy, K-Ci & JoJo
58. You Make Me Sick, Pink
59. What It Feels Like For A Girl, Madonna
60. E.I., Nelly
61. Dig In, Lenny Kravitz
62. Get Ur Freak On, Missy Elliott
63. Breathless, The Corrs
64. Every Other Time, LFO
65. Yellow, Coldplay
66. Best I Ever Had (Grey Sky Morning), Vertical Horizon
67. One Minute Man, Missy Elliott
68. I Do, Toya
69. Fly Away From Here, Aerosmith
70. I’m A Slave 4 U, Britney Spears
71. Smooth Criminal, Alien Ant Farm
72. Still On Your Side, BBMak
73. No More (Baby I’ma Do Right), 3LW
74. My Everything, 98 Degrees
75. Ms. Jackson, Outkast
76. Start The Commotion, The Wiseguys
77. Free, Mya
78. Baby, Come On Over (This Is Our Night), Samantha Mumba
79. Hemmorhage (In My Hands), Fuel
80. Drowning, Backstreet Boys
81. Around The World (La La La…), ATC
82. Thank You For Loving Me, Bon Jovi
83. AM To PM, Christina Milian
84. Izzo (H.O.V.A.), Jay-Z
85. Flavor Of The Week, American Hi-Fi
86. What’s Going On, All Star Tribute
87. Stronger, Britney Spears
88. One More Time, Daft Punk
89. I’m A Believer, Smash Mouth
90. We Fit Together, O-Town
91. Differences, Ginuwine
92. Follow Me, Uncle Kracker
93. There You’ll Be, Faith Hill
94. So In Love With Two, Mikaila
95. In My Pocket, Mandy Moore
96. Mad Season, Matchbox 20
97. Bad Day, Fuel
98. What’s Your Fantasy Ludacris
99. Liquid Dreams, O-Town
100. Babylon, David Gray

Early Saturday Musings

I usually sleep in on Saturdays, and even more so when we stay up late feeding our Smallville addication. But this morning was different. About 6am, I woke up because the fan was blowing on me, and it had finally cooled down enough that it was uncomfortable. I tried to ignore it, but finally gave in and got out of bed to turn it off. I laid in bed trying to fall back asleep, but instead it seems I’m up for the day — my mind wouldn’t go back to sleep, it has been racing a million miles a second. It seems I am stressed about work, specifically maintaining country of origin labeling (COOL) codes in the computer. And I guess I should be, we have some 7000 item codes that need to be kept up to date. It was originally supposed to be a cooperative effort, the buyers working together with me to keep them maintained. But it seems somewhere they got it into their heads that I would be taking care of everything, updating the COOL codes from the bill of lading paperwork when the item lands. I took this up with my boss Thursday, and she said she would get back to me. I suspect I’m going to be stuck with it.

When I lay in bed awake on mornings like this, I am able to brainstorm and problem solve very efficiently. So now I have a plan to make my life easier when it comes to maintaining COOL codes - I will have to experiment on Monday to make sure it works. I am hoping it will, or I will have to have a part time assistant to get everything done, at least if they don’t want me getting overtime (they already start nagging on me if I even approach 40 hours).

After coming up with my solutions, I rolled over and cuddled with Jaspy, propping myself up and watching Damian sleep. Sleeping children are a beautiful thing. I think he was having a nightmare, though of what I have no idea, he has never had a traumatic experience. I wonder what he dreams of. His eyes are twitching, obviously in REM sleep. He startles a few times, makes sad faces, and makes a few sad sounds. What could make my baby-cakes so sad? It tears my heart out, so I stroke his face and he calms down. He wakes up a few minutes later, and Jaspy takes him potty.

Today, we are going apple picking, what has become a yearly tradition to celebrate the autumn equinox. The equinox is close, just a few short days away. The equinoxes and solstices have always been power days for me, when I reconnect, and re-balance, and re-evaluate my life. I can feel this one coming on, I feel the stress fading away and I an energized. This weekend is going to be good.

New Site Design

After a few months of work, largely interrupted by Damian’s birth, the new website design is finally up. The previous design had been around since 3/31/2007, so it was well past time for a new design. This new design is intentionally lighter and more clean. I plan to add more Web 2.0 features to it later to make things a bit more slick. The theme is nice enough, I might clean it up a bit and release it for general use. Anyone want to use this theme on their own blog?

All about EC

For those of you that follow my twitter, you would have seen me commend Damian on performing EC so well: Damian doing awesome ec. Didnt wet or poo a diaper all night. Even went in the potty.

Elimination Communication (EC for short) is a method of communicating with your baby about when he needs to go potty. It’s not potty training, it’s about recognizing the signals he gives you when he needs to poo or pee. Just like he gives a signal when he’s hungry (such as licking his lips, putting his fist in his mouth, or rooting), he gives very clear signals that he needs to go potty (grunting, tensing his legs, fussing a bit). If you learn to watch for these signals, you can help him go in the potty or wherever else you want him to go. Babies catch on to this very quickly - they do not like sitting in their own waste, and if they learn that you will help them not sit in their own waste they get very good at telling you they need to go. It’s about trust and communication.

From the beginning, Damian has been very good about letting us know when he needed to poo. Whenever we noticed that he needed to, we would take off his diaper and let him relieve himself on the open diaper on the changing table. There has been very few times that he has gone in the diaper directly. As far as going pee though, his signals have been much more discreet, so most of the time he would pee in his diaper. But last night, we hit a milestone. Not once did he pee in his diaper. He has learned to become more vocal about his signal that he needs to pee. All 3 times he woke up, he was dry, and when I encouraged him to go (by cuing him with noises such as ’ssssss’ for pee and ‘grrrrrrr’ for poo) he went.

Of course there is a long way to go on this, but I’m excited about how well he is doing. We won’t be out of diapers anytime soon, but we will be much sooner then most kids!

If you want more information on EC, I highly recommend the book The Diaper Free Baby by Christine Gross-loh.

Here are some other useful links on EC:

• Wikipedia: Elimination Communication
• Infant Potty Training
• newborn ec: nobody told me this would be so easy!

Snow

I thought we were done with the snow. But apparently not. It’s snowing right now.

I tried to get a picture of the falling snow, but the camera couldn’t pick it up. Jaspenelle says if we were in medieval times, her and Damian would have been declared a witch. Snow in June, I can’t believe it.

Damian Michael Stewart

Damian Michael Stewart was born on June 6, 2008 at 10:15pm. He weighed 8lbs, 8oz, and had a length of 21 inches.

Introducing “Video”

I’ve been working on a new website for about 2 weeks, and now it’s ready to share with the world. Quite simply, it’s a catalog of our home videos. Jaspenelle’s Dad bought us a video camera for Christmas, and we have made several videos.

Video by michaelandjaspenelle.com

Most people would use YouTube or some other video sharing site. I considered using them, but I prefer to host web-content myself whenever possible. If you are using a third-party, like YouTube, you have to agree to their terms and deal with their servers and their policies and restrictions. I don’t like being restricted.

The website was actually developed quite quickly - because of several existing open source solutions, I actually had a working (albeit not very pretty) mockup working after a few hours of coding. The remainder of the 2 weeks of development was making things nice and experimenting with different features. It’s built using the following technologies:

Linode

condor.garjasp.com is a Linode 360, a UML virtual server. This let’s me micro-manage everything about my hosting environment, and run any services or software that I need or want.

Ubuntu Linux

The OS is Ubuntu 7.10 Server Edition. I would have used Debian, but they are always out-of-date. Previously, this server (when it was known as manticore.garjasp.com) ran Gentoo (of which I was also a developer), but that became too difficult to keep up-to-date and secure.

Apache HTTPD Server

Only the world’s most popular http server. I have an intimate relationship with this beast, and have tamed it quite well. All configuration is pulled from LDAP (using a set of PERL scripts to autogenerate the config on startup) and is highly optimized to the server environment. For the video site, I have some mod_rewrite magic to create the pretty URLs.

PHP

The website backend uses PHP5. This is used to check for a valid video file, generate and read metadata, get a list of available video files, and allow for different templates based on the URL. It will be quite easy for me to extend the video site to have Categories, RSS feeds, or anything else I can come up with.

FFmpeg

After videos are uploaded to the server, they are encoded to FLV by FFmpeg. It is also used to generate the PNG thumbnails.

Flowplayer

Another great piece of open-source software, flowplayer plays the FLV files generated by ffmpeg. It’s highly customizable and scriptable, so I was able to make it do exactly what I wanted.

Yahoo User Interface Library

YUI provides the core scripting components to make the Web 2.0 features easy to create. I use it for easy DOM access and for dynamically loading the video metadata.

Carousel Component

This is an add-on to YUI that I use for the neat scrolling of available videos.

Blueprint CSS

In the past I have used YUI for designing websites and CSS design. I recently heard of Blueprint CSS, and it works pretty well for what I wanted to do. I’m not actually using much of the CSS framework directly - most of my CSS is actually a modified form of it’s classes. It provides a nice reference and jump-off point that YUI just couldn’t provide. YUI requires too much HTML bloat, and that’s something I’ve always disliked about it.

Currently, the code for the website is not in a releasable state - some things are very specific to the current environment. Over time, I hope to get it cleaned up, add a nice admin interface (right now all administration is done via WinSCP and SSH), and make it more configurable, then I may release it to the general public.

Let me know what you think!

Dear Daddy

Damian wrote this to me from within the womb (with Jaspenelle’s help of course)

Dear Daddy,

I feel your touch through Mommy’s belly and I know that,
  you are her strength when she feels weak,
  you are her smile when she wants to cry,
  you are her calm when her mind is the storm.

I can feel your love warm her heart.
It warms my heart too.

I can’t wait to meet you,
I can’t wait for you to hold me.
I know that,
  you will be my strength when I am weak,
  you will be my smile when I want to cry,
  you will be my calm when I am in the storm.

I love you Daddy, I love you so much.
I will be your strength and your smile and your calm too,
Whenever you need me, I will be here for you.

Your son,
Damian